1. Break into our home while we’re gone. A friend of mine has a key.
2. Tear out the tree on the back patio, tear down the fence (it’s half falling down anyway), and expand the brick about five feet in both directions.
3. Center the table we have, or chuck it out and get an old weathered picnic-bench-type thing.
4. Hang this over it:
You’d be my best friend.